Here is one observation I made over the past few years: when it comes to women most men go for the low hanging fruit. Most men never go for beautiful women. Most men think beautiful women are out of their league. Most men think it is much easier to hit on average girls. In reality it isn’t easier but the prevailing belief is such. Sadly this is also true for guys who’ve been doing pickup for years.
Guys would often ask me where do I get the courage to go after gorgeous women. I didn’t know what to tell them. It was just something I always did without giving it much thought. They would then write it off to the fact that I’m tall and good looking. Note that both height and looks are attributes that one for the most part can’t change. That means they’ve automatically excluded themselves from this imaginary category of guys that “have the right” to approach hot women. After giving it some thought I realized that I do it simply because it’s what I want as a man.
I approach hot women because as a man that’s what I want.
I don’t want to approach average women.
I don’t want to approach mediocre women.
I want to approach the hottest, most beautiful, gorgeous, stunning women.
I go for the best because I like the challenge. I go for the best because that’s where reward is the highest. I go for the best because it’s the surest way to improve. Why settle for mediocrity? Why settle for less?
Guys are afraid to go after hottest women because they think that chances of getting rejected are extremely high. And rejection is painful. And we know people will do anything to avoid pain. But actually the opposite is often true. In my experience you’re less likely to be rejected by a beautiful woman. A beautiful woman knows what it takes for a guy to go up to her in front of everyone and she will be nice to you, even if she is not interested, if only to reward your courage. Guys don’t know that because they never try.
The common excuse is “she is out of my league”
First, you don’t know that because you have never approached her. You only assumed it. Most guys have never even been rejected by a beautiful woman but somehow made up their minds about the inevitability of that outcome. Every guy has this gauge in his head that tells him how attractive is a woman he deserves. It is usually based on their very limited past experience with women. What I noticed though is that for the majority of guys that gauge chronically underestimates reality.
That means that most guys could easily be with more attractive women than the kind of women they end up with. Low self-esteem is a common culprit here. I see plenty of well rounded guys selling themselves short because of low self-esteem. That is even true for guys who’ve gotten fairly comfortable with women. Once you gain more experience you need to raise your standards or you will stop growing. Just like in weight lifting you need to keep adding weight if you want your lifts to go up and your muscles to grow. Also you’re not the only one with low self-esteem. There are plenty of hot women with low self-esteem. If you give it a shot you could be surprised to find out that you in fact may be out of that girl’s league.
Second, do you like the league you’re in right now? Do you want to stay in your league for the rest of your life? Have you considered moving up a few levels? What is holding you back? Best way to get to the next level is to start picking targets out of your familiar range, out of your comfort zone. In sports if you want to grow you need to compete against opponents who are better than you. If you constantly compete against opponents whose skill level is below yours you are going to stagnate and regress. Aiming for unreachable targets reveals your weaknesses. If you’re lacking in confidence work on that. If you’re lacking in style work on that. Work on your shortcomings and keep trying over and over until previously unreachable targets turn into comfortable targets.
Guys would say they are not good looking enough, not tall enough, not rich enough for this stunning woman. To that I say when was the last time you saw a stunning girl with an equally handsome guy by her side? That rarely happens. Are all beautiful women driven in Bentleys and Lamborghinis? Some of them are but majority of them aren’t. They are just normal regular gals who happen to be beautiful. There are many more of those than the gold digging type.
Now the downside of going after the hottest girls is that there are only so many of them. And of that limited pool you are only going to match with a few of them. It’s not easy to get much practice if you only go after the best. So in the beginning of your journey (for the first year or two) it would be impractical and even counterproductive to limit your approaches to only beautiful women. But once you gain experience and confidence there is no reason not to hit on the most beautiful women.
Here is why it is actually easier to approach beautiful women:
1. Beautiful women rarely get approached because most guys are intimidated by them. I hear people argue the very opposite that hot girls get hit on all the time. Maybe if you count the catcalls. I am talking about a real man approaching a woman he is interested in. That happens never. If you don’t believe me hear it coming out of Bar Refaeli’s mouth: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nYH7AFXNRE.
2. Beautiful women are nice people. Some of them are stuck up and spoiled but then there are plenty of those among average looking women as well. Hot women know what they are worth. They know what it takes for a man to talk to them. They rarely will blow you off.
I have to mention that there is a degree of variation in what is considered a hot girl. Some people argue that girls they find attractive may not be attractive to others. That’s really bullshit. A hot girl is a hot girl. For example, I’m not into black girls so if I saw a really beautiful black girl I would not be interested in her but that doesn’t mean she is not hot. I agree there are certain types people are attracted to but there is still a pretty universal set of standards of female (and male) beauty that society as a whole agrees on. Another example, most men find Scarlet Johansson extremely attractive. I don’t find her very appealing but I am not going to deny that she is an objectively beautiful woman. So how do you know if you’re approaching a truly beautiful woman? Here is a good rule of thumb, when you see a girl that you think is out of your league, that you think is too good for you, she is the girl you HAVE to talk to.
I say if you do anything go for the best. Shoot for the stars. Why limit yourself? The world around you will do an amazing job of limiting you in every way imaginable without your help.
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take
To conclude, I am not saying that any guy can land a supermodel. That is ridiculous and unrealistic. What I am saying is that most guys are unaware they can be with a more attractive woman than they think they can be with. They simply never try!